Last week's email (unexpectedly) received some of the most interesting reactions I've ever gotten. But the one that has left me thinking the most happened at my office. I was sitting there having my lunch (yes, the same things I always eat) when ****** came up to me and said, "You don't trust Kanye West? 🤨"
Listen, I think he's one of the most gifted, most influential, and most impactful artists of all time. He's the reason I was able to start listening to hip-hop in the car with my mom. I trust that he's always going to push the envelope and produce some incredible music and experiences. But I can't trust someone who might post screenshots of our private text messages to a platform the entire world has eyes on because maybe I didn't agree with everything he said.
"Ok, you have a point," they responded.
Footnote:
As I was typing that last paragraph, I got a notification that Kanye posted on Instagram, and it was him getting mad at some random magazine for posting Kim's comment that she left on ye’s post about taking his daughter to school. God that Kanye believes in, please help this man. There are a lot more nuances to this situation that would take many words for me to speak on. But I think Van Lathan and Rachel Lindsay’s podcast
did a good job of addressing ye
, and this
tweet also makes a great point
.
And that's when I started to think about the different degrees of trust. The different degrees to which we trust the people and institutions in our lives.
This is the Merriam-Webster definition of trust:
Those are the first two definitions. I think the first four definitions were worthy of discussing. But I don't trust that all of y'all will read each of those definitions. So here's a screenshot of the other two that this paragraph broke up to make it feel like you were reading less.
Now, definition number ONE is what everyone assumes I'm talking about when I write a list of people I don't trust. And that's mostly correct. However, I won't question someone's entire character because they don't like Waterworld. I would–– actually, never mind that. I will question your entire character. That movie is a masterpiece 💦
Let's move on to definition number TWO
This is how politicians and institutions take advantage of the people. They make you promises about the future to gain your support and ask you to "trust" their word, to "trust" they'll do right by the average person. We all know this is a lie. Whether it's the banks, the politicians, the courts, or the police, they always serve a different interest. And you can trust it's not in the best interest of the average person.
Definition number THREE is the most important one (in Society)
This is the one thing that matters more than anything else in this world. If you have property or capital, you can trust that your interests will be tended to before others'. No matter how many wrongs you've committed.
Definition number FOUR is the most beautiful one (IMO1)
This is a sacred trust bestowed upon a caretaker, a guardian, and I would even include a partner. When you're committed to another human, regardless of the nature of your relationship, you can make or break their world by how you treat the trust they’ve given you. When you are lucky enough to be trusted by your friends, family, or lovers, I advise you to respect what they trusted you with. And that comes from someone who's both broken trusts and had their trust broken before.
But these definitions and my examples are just scratching the surface of trust. Ultimately, it's up to you to decide what you believe trust is. I'm just here on 2uesdays to give you a distraction from everything else going on in your life, and you can trust that I'm going to do that. So here's an entirely different list than last week's that's also based on trust. Up to you to decide what form of trust each of these entities receives.
People I trust, et al.:
Zendaya
Anyone who has invited me in their boat after the year 2014 (a single person)
The dude who worked at the movie theater with me in 2011 and told me there was a glitch in the check-in system that allowed me to clock in 7 minutes late and clock out 7 minutes early and not get any pay deducted. So we could get 14 free minutes every shift.
People who wave at every dog they see and talk to them like they're humans.
People who make funny faces at babies on the elevator
Aunties and Grandmas who cook for family gatherings and have that extra turkey neck skin hanging from their tricep. Once you see that person in the kitchen, you know the food is gonna be delicious 😋
People who delete their entire work email inbox once they've opened the emails. Honestly, this behavior is batshit insane to me. I can't imagine not having all those emails to look back on just in case. You never know what you might need them for! But if they've lived this long pulling that off, shit, there's something special about them.
People who keep sending me post after post via my Instagram DMs even though I haven't responded to the last 10 messages they've sent but they trust I'll get around to it eventually
People who send me a picture of something pink and say, "This reminded me of you! 💝"
People who see me and greet me by screaming "Oye 2NOSABEE!!!" or "Oye YATUSABEEE!!!"
People who read my email every week
People who respond to my New Years text message every year
People who cancel their plans on a Friday night to go to my birthday party
People who let me live in their stomach for nine months just vibing
People who are my dad
People who still tag me in Instagram memes sometimes instead of sending me the actual post to my DMs
People who remember the names of all my family members since the first time I mentioned them and always ask about them
My friend Butters
People who respond to my text of "I need your help. I can't tell you what it is, you can never ask me about it later, and we're gonna hurt some people," with "Okay, but first delete this text conversation off all of your devices and let's move to a safe and encrypted messaging app."
People who enjoy my playlists
People who love the movie Waterworld 💦
The dude who once tweeted out that he worked at McDonald's for 10 years and he always added an extra chicken nugget on all the chicken nugget meals.
I trust that people will always interpret the world based on their own lived experiences. So the best thing you could do for yourself is to drop any expectations of someone, whether you know them or not, and go off what they show you.
Fuck it, here are more people I don't trust since y'all enjoyed it so much. It'll be the last trust list ever:
Michael Jordan
Anyone who's ever been POTUS
Anyone who's ever been Governor of Puerto Rico (that's for you, G)
Ted Cruz
Britney Spears’ dad
People who see you running to catch the elevator and stare at you while the doors close without trying to help you
The dudes who work valet in my building
The dudes who manage my building and have been telling me for six weeks they’re coming to fix the electrical outlet in my bathroom
People who rent scooters and park them in the middle of the sidewalk or leave them knocked on over on the road when they're finished using them.
People who decide whether they trust someone else or not based on a single personality trait or isolated decision.
People who have never worked a full-time minimum wage job but get upset about people flipping burgers making more than $15/hour even though they wouldn't last a second working flipping burgers.
I don’t trust that Lebron James knows the words to any song he’s ever sang out loud before
Don’t trust anything Doja Cat says on the internet
The least trustworthy person of all time: Ernesto de la Cruz 🌵
Taylor Swift 🧣
PS
Here’s a thread of reactions to last week’s email:
PPS
If you prefer to enjoy your content using apps you can now read is it Tuesday yet? in the new Substack app for iPhone.
Download that shit and enjoy my email every week right in your app without worrying if it will get lost in your filters or stuck in spam. It's easier to leave comments if you really love (or hate) me. And you can see the pictures I spend a long time every week carefully choosing to relate to the post, but you never get to enjoy it because it only shows in random places like when I tweet a link to the post. There are no real benefits to downloading this app if reading through your email is already easy enough. But it could be cool. Especially if one day down the line you maybe need to create a substack account so you can pay for my email because I started charging for it…
The Substack app is currently available for iOS. If you don’t have an Apple device, you can join the Android waitlist here.
In My Opinion